Dear Ladies in the locker room at my gym.... again......:
I understand that we are using this locker room to shower up after a workout, and therefore you will want to do things that you would do at home in your own bathroom. I think we all need to agree that some of these things should ONLY happen at home in your own bathroom. They should not be done in a semi public place where other people have to bear witness.
For example lotioning your entire body
Including your ass
ALL of your ass.
I really, really, really can not express to you how much I did not need to know that people do that, much less witness it. Please, just save that one for more private moments.
Private moments with your private parts. I don't think it's too much to ask.
thank you
11/28/12
11/26/12
slow groove
Dear Lady doing a slow groove to the generic adult contemporary tunes on the take out line in the restaurant:
The level of swaying you're doing makes me think things about you that I would wager you're not intending. You might want to realize whats going on around you just a smidge more......
Oh and, BTW, tapping your foot along with a Kenny Loggins tune just seems a bit much.
The level of swaying you're doing makes me think things about you that I would wager you're not intending. You might want to realize whats going on around you just a smidge more......
Oh and, BTW, tapping your foot along with a Kenny Loggins tune just seems a bit much.
11/6/12
literacy
Dear 2 Dudes and 1 Lady standing in the back of a restaurant waiting to be seated:
There is a sign RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU with very large bold writing on it explaining that you need to go to the OTHER side of the restaurant to be seated.
Like seriously DEAD in front of you
Maybe a foot away.
You'll have to stop yakking long enough to look around, which is seems like could take a half hour at the rate your going.
When that time does come I hope you feel stupid. 'Cause you are being stupid right now.
There is a sign RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU with very large bold writing on it explaining that you need to go to the OTHER side of the restaurant to be seated.
Like seriously DEAD in front of you
Maybe a foot away.
You'll have to stop yakking long enough to look around, which is seems like could take a half hour at the rate your going.
When that time does come I hope you feel stupid. 'Cause you are being stupid right now.
11/1/12
halloween
Dear World-
I feel the need to inform you I finally found the most disturbing halloween costume ever. Granted, someone else had created it, but I saw it, took note and am reporting it, so therefore I get the credit.
This grown man was wearing a full rabbit suit (with giant head), with a robotic baby in a sling across his chest- baby was facing him. The robo-baby kicked and swung it's head around while the rabbit's mouth grazed it's head. Sorta like the Rabbit was gonna eat it's own human baby.
Picture it
No, really, think about it and conjure up a picture.
And the next 3 nights when you can't sleep due to not being able to shake that picture- that's my fault.
Sorry. I just couldn't be alone with it.
Happy Halloween,
me
I feel the need to inform you I finally found the most disturbing halloween costume ever. Granted, someone else had created it, but I saw it, took note and am reporting it, so therefore I get the credit.
This grown man was wearing a full rabbit suit (with giant head), with a robotic baby in a sling across his chest- baby was facing him. The robo-baby kicked and swung it's head around while the rabbit's mouth grazed it's head. Sorta like the Rabbit was gonna eat it's own human baby.
Picture it
No, really, think about it and conjure up a picture.
And the next 3 nights when you can't sleep due to not being able to shake that picture- that's my fault.
Sorry. I just couldn't be alone with it.
Happy Halloween,
me
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